4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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