Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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