No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
