Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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