If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize