Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize