drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
