You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
