I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
