just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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