I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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