eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Randomize
