I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
