Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
