I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize