Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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