That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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