so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
