I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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