he wants to bone in the snuggie
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
