he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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