I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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