Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
