Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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