before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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