It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
