My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
