How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
