If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
