im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
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