I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
