so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
