We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
Quick, to the slutcave!
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
