I wannas sexs uuuuu
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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