Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize