he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
