So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
