So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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