How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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