How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
