You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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