so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
