I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
