I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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