So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Randomize
