And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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