whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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