I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
