his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I would fuck him just for his dog
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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