She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize