sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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